Living in the UK as a Nigerian comes with its own mix of opportunities and challenges — from adapting to the weather and culture, to building a support network far from home.
If you’re naturally empathetic (an “I feel what you feel” kind of person), you might have noticed that your emotional sensitivity sometimes leaves you drained, anxious, or even overwhelmed.
Research shows a strong link between high empathy and anxiety. The good news? With boundaries and self-care, you can continue caring for others without letting anxiety take over.
What Empathy Means — and Why It Can Be Intense for Nigerians Abroad
Empathy helps you understand other people’s feelings and see life from their perspective. For us Nigerians, empathy is often part of our upbringing — we’re taught to “look out for each other”, whether it’s helping a neighbour back home or checking on a friend’s mental health here in the UK.
But empathy isn’t just a fixed personality trait. It develops through life experiences, relationships, and even our cultural values. That’s why some of us, known as empaths, experience emotions so deeply that we “absorb” the feelings of those around us.
As an empath, if your friend in London is stressed about visa issues, you might lose sleep worrying too. If your family back in Naija is going through hard times, you might feel the emotional weight as if you were there in person.
The Link Between Empathy and Anxiety
If you live with anxiety, you might often:
- Worry about decisions you’ve made that affect others.
- Imagine yourself in other people’s difficult situations.
- Struggle to “switch off” after hearing bad news.
A UK-based Nigerian empath might, for example, hear about rising living costs affecting friends and instantly feel their stress — even if your own finances are stable.
A 2018 study found that the more we feel others’ emotions (affective empathy), the higher our anxiety levels can climb.
Why? Because when you share emotions but can’t fix the situation, guilt and worry can set in, leading to emotional burnout.
Social Anxiety and Empathy
Some empaths also face social anxiety — feeling nervous in group settings or avoiding social events altogether.
Studies show that people who feel others’ emotions deeply but struggle to understand them often find social interactions overwhelming. For Nigerians in the UK, this could mean sticking to familiar circles and avoiding larger community events, even when you want to connect.
How Nigerians in the UK Can Cope
1. Practice Mindful Acceptance
Instead of trying to “turn off” your empathy, learn to manage it:
- Take deep breaths when you feel overwhelmed.
- Acknowledge your feelings but remind yourself that carrying the pain won’t solve the problem.
- Shift from feeling to compassionate action — offer a kind word, pray for them, or suggest helpful resources.
2. Set Healthy Boundaries
Not every emotional load is yours to carry.
- Limit time with people who constantly drain your energy.
- Reduce exposure to heavy news or distressing WhatsApp group chats.
- Give yourself permission to say “I can’t talk about this right now”.
3. Avoid Overthinking
Rumination (replaying the same worries) can make anxiety worse.
- Distract yourself with uplifting activities — cooking your favourite Naija dish, walking in the park, or watching comedy skits.
- Journaling can help release thoughts instead of letting them loop endlessly.
4. Seek Professional Support
If anxiety starts affecting your daily life, consider speaking to a therapist. In the UK, you can access:
- NHS Talking Therapies (free, though wait times vary)
- Private counselling (in-person or online)
- Culturally aware therapists who understand the Nigerian/British experience
Final Word
Being an empath is a gift — it makes you compassionate, caring, and deeply connected to others. But without emotional boundaries, it can also lead to anxiety.
For Nigerians in the UK, where life’s pressures can feel multiplied by distance from home, learning to protect your emotional energy is essential.
Empathy should empower you, not exhaust you.
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