Ah, Nigerians in the UK, we dey inside snow season again o! For those wey don land UK thinking say “abroad na paradise,” welcome to the reality show of “Snow and Ice Wahala” brought to you by the Met Office. Dem don give us five yellow weather warnings, and this one no be play. If you wan japa safely or waka for this obodo oyinbo cold, make you shine your eye and follow these tips.
1. “Dress Like Onions”
Forget fashion for now. Na survival mode we dey. Layer up like onion—thermal wear, sweater, jacket, scarf, gloves, hat, and even socks on top socks. E better make you look like portable duvet than to freeze like ice fish.
2. No Be Time for Slippers and Ankara
Abeg, ditch your rubber slippers and Ankara fabric for now. Wet ground fit turn skating rink without warning. Get boots with good grip, or else you go learn ice skating by force when you no plan am.
3. Carry Your Naija Spirit of Preparation
Remember how we dey always carry small garri for emergency? Do the same here o! If you dey drive, stock your car with essentials: warm blanket, snacks, torch, water, ice scraper, and portable phone charger. No forget your Naija music playlist—e go ginger you if traffic catch you.
4. Don’t Japa Without Checking Road and Train Updates
Before you step out, check the Met Office or transport websites for any delays or closures. This weather no dey respect anybody. If dem say road no good, abeg stay house. Snow no get time for “I must go work today.”
5. Walk or Waka Wisely
For my people wey no get car, waka for main roads and avoid small paths wey nobody dey use. Those places fit be icy like sachet water for freezer. Walk small-small, no rush, or else you fit land for ground like agbado.
6. Keep Power Bank and Flashlight Close
For those wey dey rural areas, dem talk say power fit cut off. You no go wan sit down for house in darkness and dey wonder where NEPA dey. Charge your devices and get torchlight ready like war zone preparation.
7. Use Naija Food for Warmth
This na perfect weather for pepper soup, egusi, or banga. E go warm your body and remind you say you be Naija. Add ginger or pepper if e too cold. Forget oyinbo soup for now, our own dey do pass!
8. Follow Weather Update Like Arsenal Scores
Na who no dey informed go chop cold anyhow. Stay updated with the Met Office warnings. This snow fit turn to rain or ice anytime, and e fit switch from small wahala to big gbege.
Pidgin Proverbs for Motivation
- “No be who rush go market first dey sell pass; take your time.”
- “Cold no get respect for oyinbo or Naija, so bundle up!”
- “Who no prepare for snow go dey use body pay school fees of experience.”
So my people, no carry Naija stubbornness enter this snow season. Follow these tips, keep safe, and remember: this obodo oyinbo snow no send anybody o! Stay warm and thank me later.
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